choosing love, happiness, love, self care, self-love

Choosing love

Love over everything.

Decision making hasn’t always been my strength. I over think everything literally EVERYTHING, but I’ve made the decisions to choose love always.

These past few days I’ve had to make some changes and decisions in my life. I’ve been trying to remove myself from toxic situations and toxic people. I’ve been trying to surround myself more by loved ones and positive energy.

I’ve come to realize that God, my family and my husband are all I need. I don’t need anything more. I want to be happy and enjoy my love ones. I want to build memories I can look back on when I’m older. I want to live a life filled with love. Enormous amount of love and joy.

I know not everything will always be happiness in this world. There will be times where God will challenge me and things will make me doubt myself and my faith, but with God’s love I will rise to the occasion and with the love and care of my loved ones, I will flourish.

I will choose love always. I will let go of all that have hurt me, doubted me and betrayed me. I will no longer give into the hurt they’ve caused me before. I will forgive myself for allowing those to hurt me. I will choose love.

 

choosing love, happiness, life, love, wedding

Six Months

Six Months. Half a year. One hundred and eighty-two days and a whole life time to go. Honestly these past few months have flown by so fast. I honestly feel that marriage has fitted me so well.

The idea of marriage overall has always excited me. I love the idea of spending the rest of my life with my one and only. When Oscar and I got engaged I almost passed out from the excitement. The week of our engagement it was none stop calls, texts and celebrations from our loved ones. Everyone was very excited for us and it was such an amazing feeling. Our families have played such an important factor in our happiness and marriage. The amount of love and support we’ve received from our loved ones now and then has shown us that with love anything is possible. Although many believe we were way to young to get married, it has been the BEST decision we’ve made.

Believe me when I say marriage is NOT easy. It requires A LOT of work. Consider it a full-time job. You have now moved into a new life where you are sharing everything with your significant other.  *Correction* As I lay here and write my blog Oscar asked if he could use my toothbrush ( just to be a smart ass and prove me wrong) I said “no” and he said “you liar we don’t share everything.” LOL

So you don’t share “everything” in marriage, but pretty close. You share your joys, sadness, fears, accomplishment and any other life changing events. With Oscar I feel I’ve shared it all and whatever is left to come. Theres is so much more to marriage than what people really see or hear. Marriage in my personal opinion and personal experience is difficult, but when it is done with the right person and with lots of love its a much more enjoyable experience. These past six months with my husband have been the best of times. Cheers to the years and moments to come.

Happy six months anniversary my love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

choosing love, happiness, life, love, self care, self-love

Learning Self Love . .

Self love is such a complex topic to talk about. Not sure where to start . .

IMG_7809Back in October I decided to Continue my Blog. I had been doing this for years on and off. Honestly I always wanted to be a writer but that wasn’t in the cards for me. I loved Literature and Writing back in high school, but I wasn’t as passionate about it as I am in working with families and children. ANYWAYS, Back to self-love. I’m guessing that’s why I didn’t become a writer I’m always of topic. SELF LOVE it sounds so simply yet so difficult. I love reading these tweets and Facebook post about self-love and honestly as much as I try not to,  I JUDGE. I know shame on me. At first I thought to myself do they really know what self-love is? Or is it me? Do I know what self love is?

self-love;

ˈˌself ˈləv
noun
  1. regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristic).

Thanks Google.

 

Self love is “regard for one’s own well-being and happiness.” I need self-love. I need to learn what it is and what it means. Don’t get me wrong I love myself, but do I love myself enough? I struggled A LOT in the past with”self-love.”  I’ve decide to Love my self unconditionally now. To respect myself, challenge myself and trust myself. I tend to get consumed in all the problems I think I have, and forget all I have to do is change my prospective. Life gives us the opportunity to see how significant we are to ourselves and one another. I am going to love myself immensely each day.

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October 24th, 2017

On days like this all I want is to stay in bed and cuddle with Zeus. The room feels cool with a small amount of warmth. He is laying on his bed breathing hard. He woke me up about twice in the morning around 3am and 6am. As I got up to take him out the second time, I start feeling a rush go through my body. Maybe it’s the cold air hitting me as I open the door for him or the excitement that my subconscious is feeling about the wedding. These 20 months of engagement with Oscar have flown by. It honestly feels like Oscar got down on one knee and asked me to marry him just yesterday. Oscar, Zeus and marriage is all I’ve thought about for the last few months. It has really taken over my life. It’s a feeling of excitement, joy and terror all at once. I hate change, it’s something I don’t deal with very well. The thought of changing the rhythm of life is somewhat scary in a good way. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him, but I’m also nervous about leaving my home. It’s something that is actually easier said than done. I feel like I’m leaving a huge part of me in my home. The person I once was is starting a new life. It’s definitely something I’ve always wanted without a doubt. He is truly the definition of my happiness. Theres not a day that passes by that I didn’t wished it was November 4th already. I loved all the planning and organizing but honestly I just want it to be over. It’s excruciating  pain holding down so much excitement and different feeling all at once. The excitement and nerves come harder each day as the days goes by. We are literally down the wire and I can’t wait to marry this man.